I got the chance to visit my old workplace with A the other day. We took lunch in for a friend and got to eat in my old lunch room. It’s hard to believe that it’s been almost a year and a half that I quit a job I loved, to pursue a job that I (most of the time) love, too.
That new job was to be a mom. A stay-at-home mom, but a mom, nonetheless.
I miss the identity of being a nurse. But I love being the wife, homemaker, MOM, of our household.
There are many hats that I’ve worn. So many things I can claim. Though, a lot of days, it feels like I’m ‘just a mom’, and that’s it.
The truth for me is this: I love it. But I hate it.
I love that I am raising our daughter (and soon a son) the way that we want them raised. I love that I can have dinner on the table for my family every day, promptly, at 5 o’clock. I love that I can do what I want, when I want, even though I have to schedule around nap times, bedtimes, plan ahead with toddler snacks and cups, diapers, etc. Some days it’s a struggle. But it’s worth it.
From the outside looking in, it looks like a fairytale. It is, in some ways. At least once you get used to it.
But what I really hate the most? Is that now society throws this blanket statement over me, and other stay-at-home moms, that we’re ‘just moms’. All those things I did in the past? Doesn’t seem to matter anymore. All those life experiences that taught me to be the mom that I am? Who cares. You’re ‘just a mom’.
You want to know who I am? I’m a daughter, a wife, a Christian, a niece, sister-in-law, aunt, and a friend to many. I cook (and I’m pretty damn good at it), I clean, I garden. I’m a kick ass knitter, and I’m pretty awesome with a sewing machine, too. I’m a swimmer. I love barre3 (though not when this terribly pregnant). I’ve been on a pretty amaze balls missions trip to Guatemala. I was a lifeguard for 5 years (miss the ‘tanning’ perks of that job…) I’ve made it this far into parenthood without driving a van, and I’m pretty sure that streak will stick (sorry to my friends who are van fans). I was a pretty sick cello player; spent EIGHT FULL YEARS as first chair. I was a Farm Show Queen, and I rocked it. I still hold a valid nursing license. I was a pediatric nurse for 5 years, and THAT is pretty kick ass, too. I can drive a truck AND back it into a parking spot in one shot (go ahead, dare me). I can shoot bow better than my husband (though, don’t bother asking him, he won’t admit to that).
I’m pretty bad ass. I’m not ‘just a mom’. True, I’ve got the battle scars to PROVE that I’m a mom. But I am so much more. I’ve done so many things in my life, that at this point? At this point, no. I’m not just a mom. I am a bad ass mom.
And my fellow mom friends? You’re bad ass too.
So this Mother’s Day, I’m going to celebrate who I am right now in life. I know I will always be a mom. That became a reality on May 1st of 2013. At this point, I am really in the thickest trenches of parenthood. But I am also celebrating who I was and reminiscing about all of those other battle scars I got (they definitely weren’t from playing cello…. maybe I shouldn’t go into detail on some of those). And I am celebrating the fact that I lived through those years and that I can now say that because of those experiences, I’m not ‘just a mom’. I am a bad ass mom.
❤ One bad ass mom