No, it’s not a children’s book. Well, not one that we have anyhow. This is more like a horror story.
A few weeks ago I was getting ready to take a shower after A and C were already sleeping. Stripped myself down, walked into the bathroom and turned on the light. You can’t make this stuff up: A MOUSE LITERALLY FELL ON THE FLOOR. I have no idea where from. And ran into our bathroom closet. I had enough sense about me not to scream, as everyone was sleeping. But I DID jump up on the bathroom sink. And waited it out for about 10 minutes, at least until my heart stopped trying to jump out of my chest and play dead on the bathroom floor.
I calmly sprinted past the closet and went to wake up C.
“Honey…… Honey……. There’s a mouse in the house.”
“Well…… Can you get it?”
(pause) ……….”How do you want me to do that?”
“I don’t know! Just GET IT!”
So my sleepy husband got out of bed and went into the closet, searching around. He saw it once, but obviously couldn’t catch it. I don’t know why I was thinking that someone could actually CATCH a mouse.
He set a trap up and called it a night.
I, on the other hand, was still freaking out. I desperately needed a shower, but was too freaked out to go back into the bathroom by myself. He saw me NAKED! I laid in bed for awhile. Not being able to sleep, because I know mice can climb, and it creeped me out that he might try to come and get me overnight. I know, highly illogical….
Nothing was in the trap in the morning. I was simultaneously bummed, pissed off and still creeped out.
That was the day that I cleaned out our bedroom closet and found TONS of piles of mouse turds. Went into A’s room later in the day to get something from a bin in her closet on the floor. And found TONS of mouse turds. (I had just recently cleaned her closet out) Went to the living room to clean up a little bit and moved some pillows I had stacked on the floor. AND FOUND TONS OF MOUSE TURDS. This bastard was throughout my entire house. I went to the cabinet under the kitchen sink to get some cleaning spray (mouse turds stink). AND FOUND EVEN MORE MOUSE TURDS UNDER THE SINK!
Now, I was downright PISSED. This bastard (or bastards) were going to DIE. I have to say, I love animals. We have our golden girl, Auty, who is my best friend. I’ve had several cats over the years. I am NOT in anyway shape or form mean to animals. Unless of course they are unwanted in my house or on my property. The mouse and his friends were NOT wanted.
C got a pack of mouse traps on the way home. We had a ton left over from a previous year when we had a mouse in our pantry. In total, we set FIFTEEN traps. I was like a kid on Christmas Eve waiting for one of them to snap. And about an hour later (at 11:30PM) I heard one go off. I searched the house high and low and found one of the traps under the sink went of, but no mouse.
I went back to bed, dejected at our apparent failure in mouse trapping. The next morning we checked EVERY trap and couldn’t find a single mouse. I was LIVID.
These bastards were running my house and we set traps up EVERYWHERE, and had yet found a single one. They were WATCHING me. I could feel it.
Later that evening we were sitting on the couch, A was playing on the floor and we heard another snap come from under the kitchen sink. I jumped up so fast you would’ve thought somebody shot me in the rear end. When I found the bastard dead in the mouse trap I literally did a touchdown dance.
When I turned around C was looking at me like I had just sprouted an extra limb. “You were afraid to go in the bathroom two days ago, and now you’re acting crazy because there’s a dead mouse in our house.”
“But he’s DEAD!”
“Well, then take it outside.”
“I’m not touching it!”
The next day I was moving something in the living room and just happened to look back at the one trap we set beside the couch (away from the dog and the kid). And we had harvested another little bastard. I have no idea how long that one was there. But either way. We’ve gotten two so far! We’re keeping all the rest of the traps up, just in case we have any other friends that are hanging out somewhere.
Oh, and by the way, I did end up taking a shower. 🙂 I’m not still walking around stinky, because I was afraid of a mouse. And yes, that is a totally logical and legitimate fear. Don’t judge.